10 2 / 2014
Cis people - pansexuality is not defined as “men, women, and trans people”. Trans people are not an inherently separate gender category. If you really want to describe your sexuality in this way, I recommend “men, women, and nonbinary people”. Or, you could just say “all people”. Separating binary trans people from binary cis people is transphobic and gross and just don’t do it.
09 2 / 2014
Lately, I’ve been thinking about privilege.
There’s a ton of things I could talk about regarding privilege, but right now I’m focusing on my privilege as a cisgender person within my relationship with a transsexual man.
There are some things my partner is going through, will go through, and has gone through that I can never really understand.
I can’t really understand what it’s like to have dysphoria, or to have to change my name, or have to get surgery to live with my body.
So honestly, there are times when the best thing I can do is to just listen.And yeah, sometimes I feel like this isn’t enough, like I should be doing something more, or working harder to understand. And I do work to be in an understanding place. I read articles by other individuals, I ask other people questions (respectfully), I Google a LOT - and all of this has value.
But at the end of the day, I can’t erase the fact that my partner is experiencing something I can’t/won’t experience, and the best authority on his experience is him.
No amount of research and/or understanding is going to erase the fact I have cis privilege. Nor should it.
My being cis means that there are things I can’t understand.
And that’s alright, but I have to understand that and respect my limitations and privilege in some conversations/spaces.
There isn’t really a point to this post, I have just been thinking lately.
08 2 / 2014
Anonymous asked: I remember Buck Angel mentioning that those who go on testosterone should use estrogen cream on their genitals to keep them healthy. Is this true?
I have never heard of this
Estrogen creams or suppositories are often recommended for folks who’ve been on T for a while and are dealing with atrophy downstairs. It can help resolve issues like pain with penetration, excessive dryness, bleeding, and recurring infections. There’s some information about it on p. 55 of Nick Gorton’s book Medical Therapy and Health Maintenance for Transgender Men (pdf), which is free online and a great general resource.
27 1 / 2014
1. “Do you like when I…?”
2. “I like when you…”
3. “Will you…?”
4. “How does this feel?”
5. “Do you want me to…?”
6. “Do you want to…?”
7. “Is there anything you want to try?”
8. “Show me what you like.”
9. “Do you want to go further?”
10. “Do you want to stop?”
11. “Can I…?”
12. “Does this feel good?”
13. “Are you happy?”
14. “Are you comfortable?”
15. “Are you having a good time?”
16. “Is this good for you?”
My favorite thing about this list: the mix of statements, open-ended questions, and yes-or-no questions.
24 1 / 2014
A bunch of articles with titles like “Gonorrhea superbug may be deadlier than AIDS!” keep popping up on my dash. They all seem to trace back to this CNBC article, which was published last May; who knows why it’s become so popular again. The thought of a strain of gonorrhea that is highly contagious and worse than AIDS is terrifying… but it’s also completely bogus. Here’s why:
The article’s “expert” isn’t one:Alan Christianson, the person quoted in the article is a naturopath, not a medical doctor. His specialty is “natural endocrinology” and he doesn’t appear to have any particular background in infectious disease or sexual health. (source)
So far, cases of antibiotic-resistant gonorrhea are very isolated: H041, the strain of gonorrhea that is resistant to all current antibiotic treatments, has only been reported in one person, in Japan (source). There are other strains of gonorrhea that are resistant to one or more antibiotics, and this is a growing problem, but they can still be treated with alternate antibiotic regimens (source).
Antibiotic-resistant gonorrhea is not known to be more virulent: Christianson says that “the [antibiotic-resistant gonorrhea] bacteria is more aggressive and will affect more people quickly… Getting gonorrhea from this strain might put someone into septic shock and death in a matter of days.” There have been no reported deaths from H041 (even the CNBC article admits this), and I can’t find any other sources saying that it’s any more virulent than other strains of gonorrhea.
Gonorrhea virtually never causes death from septic shock: Gonorrhea can enter the bloodstream and lead to widespread infection; this is called gonococcemia or disseminated gonococcal infection, and it happens in 0.5-3% of gonorrhea cases (source). This is not the same as septic shock. While gonococcemia can lead to septic shock and death, it is exceedingly rare — only two deaths have ever been reported, here and here.
Gonorrhea is nothing like AIDS: The death rate from untreated AIDS is 98%. The death rate from untreated gonorrhea is 1%. (source)
The truth about gonorrhea: Gonorrhea is the second most commonly-reported infectious disease in the United States. People with gonorrhea may show symptoms, but are also likely to be asymptomatic; it is generally easily cured with a single dose of antibiotics, but if left untreated, it can lead to infertility and increased risk of HIV transmission. The best way to avoid gonorrhea is to use barriers like condoms and dental dams for penetration and for oral sex. Testing for gonorrhea involves a urine sample or a simple swab; some clinics will even let you do your own swab so you don’t have to have an exam.
ThinkProgress, Planned Parenthood, and the Centers for Disease Control have all published much more accurate stories about drug-resistant gonorrhea. The take-home message? Antibiotic resistance is a major and growing problem, and it’s a good idea to avoid gonorrhea. But antibiotic-resistant gonorrhea is not a lethal superbug, and it doesn’t do any good to spread a nonsense rumor in the name of sex ed — especially one that’s been turned into a scare tactic or a political issue.