February 2012
2 posts
tobitastic:
Trans Sexuality - A Safe Sex Zine
Safe sex information is almost universally designed for non-trans (and straight) folks, and then that information is given to us when and where it applies. However, there is a lot of information that is unique to trans people and trans bodies that never gets included. This zine answers the question, what would sex ed look like if it was designed...
“Of course, this is one of the profound ways in which oppression works—to mire us...”
– Eli Clare, “Stolen Bodies, Reclaimed Bodies” (via thenewwomensmovement)
4 tags
January 2012
16 posts
1 tag
3 tags
Ask: limit lists for trans folks
do you know of an actual limit list for two trans folks dating each other newly and not yet ready for a bdsm limit list? please and thanks.
There are a lot of good limit lists floating around, but I think the one at Scarleteen is incredible, and particularly trans-inclusive. It’s comprehensive and detailed: not only does it include all kinds of sex acts, but it also talks about other forms...
I WOULD LIKE TO START A SUPPORT GROUP/DISCUSSION...
feral-femme:
feral-femme:
there are lots of white queer people who i hold very near and dear to my heart. my best friend/platonic life partner, my girlfriend, and many of the queer people who i am closest to are white. my mom is also white and is kind of queer. i think they all identify and work on being anti-racist white people but there are still, obviously, plenty of instances where i feel...
1 tag
Ask: Trans-inclusive language in a menstrual...
[Heads-up that this contains a lot of medical/anatomical terms, and some references to menstruation.]
I know this may not be the best place to go, and I know that many trans* people feel it’s not their job to educate those who are not, but I can’t really find a clear answer on this. I run a menstrual health blog and, through the guidance of others, have been working and learning about...
Reblog if you'll answer sex-related questions.
Sure thing! The Transcending Anatomy ask box is always on.
A Wish List for Trans-Inclusive Sex Ed
I wish for no one to be labeled as a “(wo)man”, or even as “(fe)male-bodied”, because of their anatomy. I wish for the chance to describe my own body and to name my own parts.
I wish for discussion about how to come to terms with my body, how to ease the pain of dysphoria (mine or someone else’s), how to be connected with the parts that change and how to accept the...
Amy Dentata: On Girl Cock and Trans Sex →
every-inch-but-one:
One of the greatest things about being with my partner has been the amount of freedom we both (I feel like I can speak for us both here, but correct me if I’m wrong, baby) feel in regards to experimenting with our bodies in a completely unself-conscious way. I’m thinking…
“[content related to sexual abuse and assault] When you’re considering talking to...”
– The Courage to Heal: A Guide for Women Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse by Ellen Bass & Laura Davis (via healingquotes)
Another few more questions that I consider: Has this person generally been supportive in the past? How have they reacted to other “bad news”, such as a mistake or something I...
No More Apologies: Queer Trans and Cis Women,... →
amydentata:
queershoulder:
This looks FUCKING AMAZING, and I only wish I’d known about it sooner, because it is absolutely the kind of thing I would have come to Toronto for, no joke. I hope there will be more in the future!
No More Apologies:
Queer Trans and Cis Women, Coming/Cumming Together!
A FREE conference about social exclusion, sex, and sexual health
Saturday, January...
1 tag
Ask: Changing partners' perceptions
I’m genderqueer, but my two sexual partners are straight cis men. They both knew me before I came out (though my presentation is mostly the same as before, always fairly androgynous). They try to understand, ask polite questions about, and respect my gender identity, but still mess up pronouns and words (calling me girl etc.), and I feel that they don’t really see me as...
Looking for trans* sexual assault resources
letstalkaboutrape:
Everyone came through with the male survivor resources, so I’m looking for some that specifically address the trans* community. I have survivorproject.org but if anyone has others, I’d really appreciate it!
http://www.transthrive.org/
http://www.thenetworklared.org/
http://www.pandys.org/lgbtsurvivors.html
http://www.lambda.org/
If anyone has more, please add!
...
Submission: Disconnect with my breasts and breasts...
I have a total disconnect with breasts. I have them. I bind them most days, let them be free whilst I’m alone on other days. Sometimes I lay my hands upon them for warmth. Sometimes I just like to feel how they squish. Never, though, do they bring me any arousal or pleasure. They’re just there. I don’t mind this. I like them that way.
The problem I seem to have though is that I...
We're back!
Happy belated 2012! As you may have noticed, I took a few weeks off to observe holidays with my family, work on my thesis, and finish a few job applications. Thanks for your patience while things have been quiet over here, and welcome to the new followers who’ve come across this Tumblr!
Extra thanks are due to everyone who’s submitted material or asked questions recently —...
December 2011
24 posts
A Note About Cissexism...
manybothans:
I had a really great pride this year, but I was also troubled by comments I heard over the last week from a lot of people in both the mainstream and radical queer communities. I want to say a few things about cissexism, specifically towards trans women and other MTF spectrum folks.
1) Gay sex does not require genital symmetry.
Most people in the community realize that not...
2 tags
Sex Toy Care and Cleaning Guide →
Part of playing safe means taking care of the toys and prosthetics in your life! The packaging that they came in is always the best place to check for information about cleaning and maintenance, but this website is a thorough refresher.
Two key things to remember:
1. Know whether the materials you’re using are porous or non-porous. Porous materials cannot be fully sterilized, so if more...
1 tag
“I refer to my junk (which is technically pre-operative) as my vagina, since i do...”
“I pretty much discovered all my sexual likes and dislikes through trial and...”
3 tags
“My limits shift around. Most of the time they’re pretty hard to trip, and...”
1 tag
4 tags
“I like bondage and BDSM and consider myself pretty open-minded about all that,...”
3 tags
“Penetration is sometimes okay because of my complete trust for my husband, but...”
3 tags
How to Still Have Sex (if You Want it) Despite...
iragray:
Are you afraid that your dysphoria will render you incapable of having enjoyable sex? Do you avoid having sex (assuming you want to to begin with) because you’re not sure how you’ll react? These are perfectly valid concerns, and no one should tell you otherwise. This post isn’t meant to pressure you into having sex and should not be used by partners of trans* folks as such. This is for...
Gender-Neutral Equivalents to Boyfriend/Girlfriend
Obviously, this is an incomplete list.
Paramour
Significant Other/SO
Genderfriend
Lover
Sweetie/Sweetheart
Partner
Cuddle buddy
Soul mate
Steady
[name]friend
Mate
genderqueer partners
i like the term “bothfriend”
2 tags
From the Ask box: am I trans?
I don’t know what I am. Whenever I imagine myself having sex, I always imagine myself as a guy. When I was still learning about sexuality as a teen, I tried masturbation and found it painful and unattractive. I like having a manly voice. The thing is, I don’t have a lot of other traits that other transgendered people have. I’ve never been afraid or hateful of my body, nor have I...
3 tags
Just got a request to signal-boost this adorable new Tumblr. Check it out, submit your own letters, and get some inspiration!
Hi I just recently started a queer love letter tumblog. I was wondering if it could get a signal boost since it is purely submission based. The letters can pertain to any type of relationship or identity. Thanks for your help and check it out!
...
Genderqueer Partners
We use partner. Also, I call him my squish, and he calls me his squeeze.
gender neutral term for dates
I started calling my date my bearfriend because we are both genderqueer bears. It’s just the right level of cute for me, without being over the top.
Names for genderqueer partners...
When I used to use the pronoun “they” my partner used to call me her theyfriend. Simple, but I really liked it.
my radical poly genderqueer special person and i...
accomplices <3
Alternatives to "boyfriend" or "girlfriend"
My boifriend and I both fall in different places under the trans*/genderqueer umbrella. I generally refer to hir as my boifriend, because ze is more masculinely identified. But we also refer to each other as our partner, our person, our human. And ze sometimes calls me hir boifriend, too. I’ve unintentionally combined boifriend and girlfriend into birlfriend in reference to myself before,...
“If you’re gonna have pizza with someone else, what do you have to do? You gotta...”
– NY Times: Teaching Good Sex (via ffolkthepainaway)
3 tags
i am human: What are some good terms for referring... →
queerphysicist:
transcending-anatomy:
A question from the Exploring Trans Sexualities panel! Got something to say? You can post a response on your own Tumblr or submit something to Transcending Anatomy here.
(I could post the list we came up with at the panel, but I’m curious what you all have to…
Most creative solution I have heard : broccoli and carrot.
Food-related partner names...
3 tags
What are some good terms for referring to...
zladkohasaboaraffe:
transcending-anatomy:
A question from the Exploring Trans Sexualities panel! Got something to say? You can post a response on your own Tumblr or submit something to Transcending Anatomy here.
(I could post the list we came up with at the panel, but I’m curious what you all have to say…)
Ones I’ve heard (in no particular order):
partner
personfriend
genderfriend
...
“I am not a woman trapped in a man’s body. This body is no man’s; it is mine, it...”
– Little Light, “the seam of skin and scales” (via vagina-pagina)
3 tags
What are some good terms for referring to...
A question from the Exploring Trans Sexualities panel! Got something to say? You can post a response on your own Tumblr or submit something to Transcending Anatomy here.
(I could post the list we came up with at the panel, but I’m curious what you all have to say…)
2 tags
World AIDS Day is December 1... have you thought...
Many Planned Parenthood clinics are offering free testing during the first week of December to acknowledge World AIDS Day. If you’re near one of their clinics and are sexually active (or have shared needles for any reason), give them a call and find out when they’re testing! Planned Parenthood tends to be really well-informed and supportive when it comes to trans issues, so this is a...
November 2011
40 posts
“Sometimes, loving your body is not an option. Sometimes, the best we can do is...”
– Lesley Kinzel for XOJane, (How Do I Stop Hating my Body?, pt 1)
3 tags
“My current partner of 6 years is HIV+, so we have a specific ongoing STI we have...”
1 tag
“Every time we get anywhere after taking off clothing, we pause and say,...”
4 tags
“I don’t know how to speak to my genderqueer partner’s chest area....”
2 tags
“I really like fucking; I like penetration, but sometimes I have mixed feelings...”
Handbasket Productions Needs Your Support →
tobitastic:
Dear Handbasket fans,
We’re incredibly proud of what we’ve been able to accomplish under the banner of Handbasket Productions. In 2010 we completed the first and only porn film by and for trans women and our community, Doing it Ourselves, and were collectively put on VelvetPark’s list of The 25 Most Significant Queer Women of 2010. Just one year later, we released a campy and...
1 tag
“I don’t like to use crude language, so while my partner likes to describe...”